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The spruiker at Man-to-Man

James McArdle — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 04:57:26 +0000

I was walking down the mall the other day on the way to Daily Choice for my cheap roll and I walked past the usual sprukers in the mall but on this day it was particularly funny because the busker had decided that he would spruke in a commentators voice. I don’t think that anyone could actually understand what he was saying. He was just mumbling away like a horse racing caller. I wasn’t sure if he was selling jackets and trousers, or telling me who was winning in Morphetville race 3. I would give him 6.5 stars out of ten, good attempt but not very effective.

Ikea Schnitzel

Guest Author — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 05:37:23 +0000

Service 10/10

It’s a self serve arrangement. I was highly impressed by my prompt and courteous service to myself (it was the highlight of the dining experience).

Atmosphere 3.95/10

The atmosphere was somewhat wooden, almost like dining in a furniture store.

Schnitty Size 3.95/10

It looked like it had been stored in the middle of a pallet of flat pack “Gruber” coffee tables. It could have been that the schnitty itself was a flat pack schnitty that I had to take home and spend an hour trying to put it together before saying “f*ck it” and finally reading the instructions.

Schnitty taste 3.95/10

Tasted like the packaging on a “Bolska” TV cabinet.

Overall 2/10

Couldn’t really have high expectations for a $3.95 schnitty, but it still failed on that account. A store like IKEA is probably more suited to selling furniture than a great dining experience.

The Seven Stars Hotel

Guest Author — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 01:44:39 +0000

Went to The Seven Stars for a lunch time schnitter on 15 January 2010, ordered a chicken schnitzel with mushroom sauce.

Service – Pretty good. Friendly staff who were relaxed and chatty. One waitress brought out all our cutlery when it was apparent that we’d all forgotten we needed knives and forks to eat our meals. Only a short wait before my schnitty appeared before my eyes too which is important at lunch with limited time available. 9/10

Atmosphere – Good. We ate outside in front of the pub in a shaded area which certainly helped with the relaxed vibe of the place. A beer outside in the warm weather waiting for a schnitty – I dont think anyone could have any complaints about that. Not too busy that we were yelling at each other either. 9/10.

Schnitty price – Excellent. Chicken schnitzel with mushroom sauce for a grand total of $12, you have to be happy with that. 9.5/10.

Schnitty size – Very good. It was bigger than a hand span and left me salivating when I spied my schnitzel in transit. Our eyes met and there was electricity in the air (that could have been from the overhead powerlines, but I dont think so), it was a special moment…. 9.5/10

Schnitty taste – Top shelf. It was golden brown as a schnitzel should be, with breast meat being used. Excellent crumbage. Chips located to the side of the schnitzel which was great, and the salad not under the chips or the schnitty. Sald was good too – tomatoes cut in wedges to avoid any awkward tomato spearing moments and nice dressing.Thick great tasting gravy with just the right amount of chunky mushrooms, and the quantity was just right to allow dunking of chips in the gravy without it running out before the end of the meal. Possibly the only complaint would be the chip:salad ratio, it was probably 50:50, where maybe it could have been 70:30, but that really is nit picking. Would have taken a photo but I was pretty keen to just get stuck in. 9.5/10.

Overall rating – Fantastic, do yourself a favour and get down to The Seven Stars for a lunchtime schnitter – you wont be disappointed. One of the greatest schnitzel experiences of my life, I can see that this could be the schnitzel all others are compared to. I would have given it a 10, but I need to leave room in the (unlikely) event there is a better schnizel experience out there. 9.5/10

Oriental Hotel – Beef Kilpatrick

Schnitzel Lover — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 04:29:28 +0000

The Oriental has changed owners since the last time I was there and you can really tell as the style of the menu and dishes has changed dramatically. It has all gone more the way of traditional pub fare. Gone are the faux oriental salads, making way for the more traditional tomato, cucumber, lettuce salad. Apparently also gone are the thick juicy “moo” beef schnitzels as well.

The salad, which was the only downfall of the Oriental Beef with mushroom of my last review, has been updated to something I would rate as a basic, good salad…lettuce, tomato, cucumber. However, that was the only improvement. The schnitzel itself was from inferior quality beef and was obviously overcooked as can be seen from the black charring around the edges and the darkened cheese (1 star off). The saving grace of this particular schnitzel was the kilpatrick topping. It was scrumptious, packed full of bbq sauce, without being overpowering, however the extra $4 (making the total $21) was a bit of a downer and at the expensive end for pub schnitzels (half a star off)…luckily I wasn’t paying.

Summary: There are better, cheaper schnitzel out there, but the kilpatrick topping was the best.

Price: $21.00 ($17 schnitzel + $4 topping)

The Hackney Hotel – Beef with Mushroom

Schnitzel Lover — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 10:41:59 +0000

The Hackney Hotel, is one of those I feel has been renovated with Pokie money. That really is the only good thing about those damn machines, all the beautifully renovated pubs. It was rather a late dinner, just scraping in 10 minutes before the kitchen closed, sitting in the fine looking bistro between the front bar and the formal dining/function room. No time to think, so I just ordered the usual fare…beef schnitzel with mushroom sauce. While we waited for our meals we enjoyed some comic relief watching the waiters try and cope with a gentleman on the adjacent table sending his steak back three times because it wasn’t cooked to his own private medium-rare specification…just order a schnitzel man! Oh and what a schnitzel! It was thick, juicy and had a delightful thick crumbing. To top that off it was also perfectly cooked to a light brown shade. I think I have only ever tasted one better schnitzel. Unfortunately, that is where the joy ends. The chips reminded me of overcooked frozen packet chips I could cook in the oven at home. Crisp on the outside for sure, but hollow and unsatisfying on the inside (1/2 star off). The mushroom sauce, though in ample quantities, tasted like their standard gravy with small chunks of mushrooms thrown in (1/2 a star off).

Summary: With a few easy tweaks to the accompaniments, this could easily be Adelaide’s premier schnitzel meal.

Price: $17.90 ($15.90 Schnitzel + $2 Sauce)